how september ends

Boundaries and balance are two of my top priorities.

Upon graduating college, I taught middle and high school social studies and career electives. As a teacher, I left school at 4p and never brought work home. I was efficient with tasks and loving with students. I created a system in my classroom that made my life easier, and I was a more attentive and peaceful teacher as a result.

At a training for my current job, the associate director nodded to the director and told us trainees with a laugh, “I see her more than I see my husband!” Soon, it become clear that her lifestyle was the expectation and not the exception, and there was little I could do to create the balance that was so important to me.

I want to be around my husband more than I want to be around my boss.

It is unfortunate, because I really do love the components of my job, but I can’t share in the belief that it comes before everything else in my life, that it replaces everything else as my life. That I should sacrifice my family, community, and health for the sake of the company.

I am frustrated with an office culture where I am tested without knowing it, where internal policies change without notice, where protocol oscillates depending on the mood of my supervisor. But I can only complain for so long without taking action.

Tomorrow is the last day I will go to work, indefinitely.

This is not a career-advancing move. In fact, it is my second resignation within four months, and in two more months, I will join the ranks of stay-at-home moms who wear leggings every day and maybe shower and one day hope to reenter the workforce.

Financially, I have no idea how it will work out. My husband is a full-time student and I have been the primary breadwinner, but I am not worried. As my step-dad told me, affirming my decision, “Life is too precious to be miserable. There will be more jobs.”

Eventually, I want to spend my days doing work I love, and receive recognition and promotion for it, but for now, I am not trying to “have it all.” I am just trying to have a happy heart. And I do. I am loved. I am supported by my husband. I feel empowered, unburdened, free. I feel like me.

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9 comments

  1. Love this Bethany! This is very encouraging for me currently! I am so proud of you for making this decision and doing what is best for you!

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  2. I am so proud of you Bethany! I am sorry to hear that that was your experience in your recent work environment. I am with you on your journey of leaving the professional world to be a mommy. It is a worthy calling, and your family is worth the sacrifice! Most importantly, God is with you. I pray blessings over your finances and your growing family. We love you all!
    p.s. When you have some time and need some encouragement as you make the transition from the professional world to the domestic world, check out my blog. I found the transition to be harder than I expected, and when I finally started to get my bearings, I realized others were likely having the same struggles I was. You can read about it here: http://www.more-than-rubies.com/?page_id=66

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    1. I read all your posts! Tell me when you’ve set up subscriptions and I’ll read all your new posts fresh off the press :)

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  3. Life is so much bigger than a job! I am sorry to hear what you have went through Bethany! There are different seasons in life, enjoy this new season of motherhood!!! And when the season of being a working mom come, God will help you adjust to that new season as well. You are so very creative, talented in many many areas, and full of life! You will do well in every seasons. :)

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    1. Thanks so much for the encouragement, Bonnie! I’m definitely enjoying this current season and excited for what’s to come :)

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